Children are among the great blessings of Allah. Allah gives these blessings, to whom he wants. No one has power to give children to anyone except Allah. Allah says, “To Allah belongs the kingdom of the heavens and the earth. He creates whatever He wills. He gives daughters to whom He wills and sons to whom He wills, or He gives them both sons and daughters. And he makes whomsoever he wants barren. Surely He is All-Knowing, All-Powerful. — Surah Shura (42): 49-50

Therefore, we should be grateful to Allah for this special blessing. We have to remember that we have some responsibilities and duties towards them. We will be asked about them on the Day of Resurrection.

Here are some responsibilities towards them-

Praying for children

Along with the effort to make them virtuous, parents should also make dua for children. There are many such duas in the Quran. For example –

رَبَّنَا هَبْ لَنَا مِنْ اَزْوَاجِنَا وَ ذُرِّيّتِنَا قُرَّةَ اَعْيُنٍ وَّ اجْعَلْنَا لِلْمُتَّقِيْنَ اِمَامًا.

O our Lord! Give us from our wives and children coolness of eyes and make us exemplary for pious ones. — Surah Furqan (25): 74

Dua of the mother of Maryam a.s. is

وَ اِنِّيْۤ اُعِيْذُهَا بِكَ وَ ذُرِّيَّتَهَا مِنَ الشَّيْطٰنِ الرَّجِيْمِ.

I give (Maryam) and her children under your protection from the Satan cursed. — Surah Al-Imran (3): 36

Dua of Zakariya a.s. is —

قَالَ رَبِّ اِنِّيْ وَهَنَ الْعَظْمُ مِنِّيْ وَ اشْتَعَلَ الرَّاسُ شَيْبًا وَّ لَمْ اَكُنْۢ بِدُعَآىِٕكَ رَبِّ شَقِيًّ, وَ اِنِيْ خِفْ الْمَوَالِيَ مِنْ وَّرَآءِيْ وَ كَانَتِ امْرَاَتِيْ عَاقِرًا فَهَبْ لِيْ مِنْ لَّدُنْكَ وَلِيًّا, يَّرِثُنِيْ وَ يَرِثُ مِنْ اٰلِ يَعْقُوْبَ وَ اجْعَلْهُ رَبِّ رَضِيًًا.

O my Lord! My bones have become weak and the whiteness of old age has appeared on my head. And O my Lord! I have never failed in praying to you. I fear for my relatives after me, and my wife is also barren, so bestow on me an heir from You, Who will succeed me (in religion) and the children of Yaqub. And O Lord! Make him favorite (to you). — Surah Maryam (19): 4-6

Dua of Ibrahim a.s. is —

رَبِّ هَبْ لِيْ مِنَ الصّّلِحِيْنَ.

O my Lord! Give me a righteous son. — Surah Saffat (37): 100

رَبِّ اجْعَلْنِيْ مُقِيْمَ الصَّلٰوةِ وَ مِنْ ذُرِّيَّتِيْ رَبَّنَا وَ تَقَبَّلْ دُعَآءِ.

O my Lord! Make me an establisher of Salah and (a group) from among my offspring. O our Lord! Accept our dua. — Surah Ibrahim (14): 40

The prophets knew what to ask from Allah and how to ask from Him. Allah Ta’ala mentioned their duas in the Holy Quran to teach us.

Give them a good and religious environment

Children learn through watching family members. This learning begins before they start speaking. Many children pray with their parents, join hands, bow and prostrate. Therefore, religious environment is essential for religious upbringing of the children.

Look at the deeds of the Prophet sallallahu alaihi wa sallam. Umar Ibn Abi Salama r.s. said, I was brought up in the house of the Prophet sallallahu alaihi wa sallam, when I was young. Once while eating, I was eating from the four corners of the dish. Then the Prophet, may Allah bless him and grant him peace, said to me:

يَا غُلَامُ, سَمِّ اللهَ, وَكُلْ بِيَمِينِكَ, وَكُلْ مِمَّا يَلِيكَ.

O child! Say Bismillah, eat with your right hand and eat from your side.' -Sahih Muslim, Hadith 2022. In this way, the children can be taught Sunnah, manners, etiquettes in their early age.

Let not the children learn misdeeds from you

Due to lack of caution, children often learn various evil deeds from parents. It is very sad.

Many a times, we give smart phones to the children to avoid their annoyance. But we do not think that in order to escape from the irritation for a short period of time, we give them a piece of fire. Their faith, character, moralities are not safe from this fire. Inna Lillahi Wa Inna Ilaihi Rajiun!

Do not give them false promise. This is a sin. Moreover, the child may learn from you falsehood. So, caution is required in this case. Listen to what the Prophet, may Allah bless him and grant him peace, said about this:

Hadhrat Abdullah Ibn Amer r.a. said- (In my childhood) One day (when I wanted to go out of the home to play) my mother called me and said, come here, I will give you something. At that time, the Prophet was in our house. He said, what do you want to give him? Mother said, I wanted to give him dates. Then the Prophet said, if you do not give him anything, then you will be guilty of making a false promise. —Sunan Abu Dawud, Hadith 4991; Musnad Ahmad, Hadith 15702

Do not utter inappropriate words even during anger. Some abuse the child during this time. It is not desirable from any civilized person.  This is  a major sin. Because of this, children do not have respect for their parents. One day children also apply these to their parents.

Be careful about the upbringing of the children

If you see the children doing something wrong, correct and teach them. Look at the actions of the Prophet, may Allah bless and grant him peace. Hadrat Abu Huraira r.a. describes –

Once,  Hassan Ibn Ali, grandson of the Prophet sallallahu alaihi wa sallam, got a date of charity and put it into his mouth. The Prophet, may Allah bless him and grant him peace, saw it and immediately said – kakh, kakh, throw it away, you don't know, we (Prophet's offspring) do not eat charity! —Sahih Bukhari, Hadith 1491

Hasan r.a. was born in Ramadan of third Hijri. So, he was very little at that time. However, the Prophet, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, did not give him any chance to do a wrong thing. He did not say that - he is young. And that is a date. Rather, he prevented him. He did not allow him to eat; In addition, he said in a slightly scolding tone for teaching him - you don't know, we don't eat charity.

This is the teaching of our Prophet sallallahu alaihi wa sallam.

Teach your children at least obligatory religious knowledge

When the children are a little older, they should gradually be taught the basic rules of religion, starting with ablution, bathing, prayer, recitation of the Holy Quran and Aqida. Children should be ordered to do good deeds. In this regard, Allah Ta'ala himself ordered the Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, to say:

وَ اْمُرْ اَهْلَكَ بِالصَّلٰوةِ وَ اصْطَبِرْ عَلَيْهَا لَا نَسَْٔلُكَ رِزْقًا نَحْنُ نَرْزُقُكَ وَ الْعَاقِبَةُ لِلتَّقْوٰي.

And order your family to perform Salah and be steadfast in it yourself. I do not ask you for sustenance, I am the one who gives you sustenance. And the ultimate end is for in favour of Taqwa. — Surah Ta-Ha (20): 132

If the children do not listen then some punishment should be given if necessary. The Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam said, when your children reach the age of seven years, order them to pray Salah. When they reach the age of ten years, beat them for laziness in prayer, and let them sleep in separate beds in this age. —Sunan Abu Dawud, Hadith 495

Although prayer is not obligatory at the age of ten, punishment is allowed, so that they become accustomed to prayer before they reach puberty. Although this hadith does not mention other acts of Islam, they are also like salah. Children should be punished if they do not follow other rules of Islam.